#SELFISH OR SELFLESS ;

I AM FREAKING NOT HAPPY WITH SUCH ARRANGEMENT. YOU MIGHT THINK WHY AM I SO SELFISH ONLY THINK ABOUT MYSELF. THE FACT IS IF YOU DON’T THINK ABOUT YOURSELF NOBODY WILL THINK OF YOU. HOW MANY TIMES I HAD BROUGHT UP SUCH ISSUES AND GOTTEN IGNORE? HOW MANY TIMES I AM BEING SELFLESS AND GET NOTHING BACK IN RETURN? YA. HE WAS RIGHT. WHAT ARE THE THINGS CAN MAKE ME FEEL CONTENTED? I THINK I HAD FOUND AN ANSWER. THE ANSWER IS FAIRNESS AND JUSTIFIABLE MONEY. HOW MANY TIMES I SACRIFICE MYSELF TO HELP OTHERS AND NOTHING GOOD GOES UPON ME? I AM NOT A CHARITY ORGANIZATION. I HAD DONE TOO MANY THINGS BEYOND MY CONTROL AND IMAGINATION. I AM TOO TIRED TO THINK OF OTHERS AND OTHERS WILL NEVER THINK FOR ME. EVEN CUSTOMERS KNOW HOW TO SAY THANK YOU, APPRECIATE YOUR EFFORT. BUT WILL YOUR OWN PEOPLE TELL U THAT? NO. QUARREL MAKES IT PERFECT. USING QUARREL TO MAKE PROBLEM SURFACE AND THEN TRY TO SOLVE THE PROBLEM. SELF CONTRADICTING MODE AT TIMES. SOMETIMES I SEE HIM WORKING HARD TO BRING CASES IN, I FELT THAT I SHOULD BE MORE MOTIVATED AND I REALLY DO. SOMETIMES I SEE HIM MAKING THE SHIT OF ME AND I AM REALLY ANGERED BY ALL THESE. MY THINGS JUST NEVER A PRIORTY. I DON’T FEEL A SENSE OF SECURITY AT ALL.

CUST CALLED HIM AND HE HAS A SHARE. IF CUST CALLED ME? THEN ITS MY JOB?

EVEN IF I HELPED TO THINK OF WAYS, YOU WILL NEVER USE MY IDEA. THEN DON’T TELL ME FOR THE SAKE OF TELLING ME. TRUE THAT, BRINGING BUSINESS IN AND FOLLOW UP THE NEXT YEAR. THEN? I HAVE TO DO THE COORDINATION AND FEEDING OF PORRIDGE INTO THE MOUTH?CHARITY ORGANZIATION COMES IN AGAIN. SEE! NOBODY WILL THINK OF YOU WHEN U HELPED THEM. WHAT S THE USE OF BEING HELPFUL? I AM VERY HELPFUL BEFORE, THERES WHAT I AM ENDING UP LIKE THIS.

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